Hospital report the second (omnibus edition)

Ow. Ow. Ow.

I don't think I will update this much until I get better.

Why did the truck run over me?

*

Aug. 21 update: I'm still sore, but the lung has fully or almost fully expanded with air. It's also leaking air, which the chest tube is allowing to escape, keeping everything expanded. Everyone expected that it might take a while to get the lung fully sealed; the surgeon spent close to an hour scraping off the scar tissue that the previous pleurodesis left behind. I'm honestly not focused on a departure date -- I want this to last, darn it -- but early next week seems plausible. In the meantime, I'm sitting up in a chair, which seemed impossible even yesterday.

*

Aug 22 update: I'm a little disappointed about how today has gone medically. Still leaky, so X-rays tomorrow. (Say "CXR" if you want to have a cool way to refer to a chest X-ray.) I've spent some time on my feet, which is good, less time in the chair, which is not so good. I don't feel like I made the jump ahead I did yesterday, but I certainly haven't regressed. I'm comfortable in terms of pain if I remember to keep up on the button, and my breathing is good. I felt more wide-open during the magical first days after getting my very first little pigtail catheter, when I could just effortlessly bring in these great flows of oxygen, but I'm not straining for breath at all. It's more that my lungs are more efficient and I can oxygenate fully without taking a full-on, ultra-deep breath. I have been enjoying a nice stream of visits from well-wishers, which feels great: T., newly cast as Daddy's Girl; L., my rock and stalwart; B., who said, "I haven't gotten to kiss you in five days!"; G., who flew in from California and didn't even get see me with my hair combed, apparently scandalizing the nursing assistant (at least that's what I thought the woman thought; she was confusing me); Scary-smart G.K. who preaches at church and whom I have some questions for (none of which I managed to ask or get answered in today's crowds); and LG., who is hooking me up with books. Damn you, friends and family! You are making me feel so lucky even when I'm... sort of not.

But then again... I sort of am.

*

Aug. 23: I spent a lot of time with W., the super medical student, talking New York restaurants. Habits linger, they truly do. The news in SG medical world is that my posterior chest tube has stopped bubbling and will be removed tomorrow. (The procedure: Morphine + groaning, football-player-like exhale combined with brisk yank. Reduce drama by adding the phrase "remove suture" somewhere around morphine if it is relevant.) The leaky anterior tube will stick around for a day or so on water seal (to get an idea of how it will behave at home). Eventually it will get a one-way drain, probably a much discussed Heimlich, and I will go home. I'm sure there will be some CXR action happening to make sure that the posterior bubble isn't reforming and to make sure the anterior bubble is also behaving nicely. I didn't ask for a revised release date. Wednesday seems plausible, though. Maybe even Tuesday if I'm lucky.

*

Aug. 24: One tube is gone. Apparently there are studies on what a patient should do during chest tube removal -- hum, hold breath, release breath, etc. -- and none of it matters all that much, so we opted for me to hold my breath and the silence worked fine. A quick tug followed by a steady pull, a weird internal slither as the tube jerked and spun its way up, and it was gone. I think I'll be in less pain generally and find it easier to get comfortable for sleep, so that's positive. I'm now more confused about what was going on medically, however. I'm not sure that either tube ever "sealed" based on what I'm hearing now, but I was sure that one had based what I was told before. Who knows? Something is bubbling maniacally down there at the moment. If I understand correctly, removing the tube will allow me to start using a Heimlich valve when I go home. The aspirational date for that, I now gather, is Thursday. I'm disappointed but thinking positively.

*

Originally published Aug. 20 or so, approximately 6 a.m. Updated as indicated.